Random Tangent

 

Dear Someone,

             I worry that my thoughts digress further and further away from my travels. Even though we live a very fast paced life I find myself mulling over various things that perplex me. Long rides on the train and tube facilitate my incessant need to analyze. The tube is a great place for advertising. This weekend they put up a new set of advertisements in preparation for the holiday season. One advertisement in particular troubled me. “Radiate Confidence with Cosmetic Surgery” 

          

             This advertisement vexed me as I silently pondered the implications on my train ride to church. What are we telling women about beauty? I thought about being a troubled teen. How desperately I strived to “radiate confidence” I thought about my own struggles with weight management. I thought about the taxing process I went through to truly appreciate what a wonderful, and lovely gift my body is. I thought about friends who have given up so much to also “radiate confidence”, and at such a high price. Living in the midst of so many women it is not uncommon to hear girls talk about hating their thighs, or detesting their stomachs, even the pores on their face are inadequate. It simply troubles me. When did it become okay to disrespect our bodies? I think that this problem can more easily remedied when we as people know who we are, and where we have come from. Essentially when we take the time to recognize our own divine, and individual birth right. I find myself stopping to pause and think. Whose validation am I trying to acquire? I can truly only think of one opinion in the scheme of things that matters.

 I was reading a conference talk that precisely addressed my concerns. M. Russell Ballard in the April 2010 conference addresses mothers, and daughters.  

“It is, unfortunately, all too easy to illustrate the confusion and distortion of womanhood in contemporary society. Immodest, immoral, intemperate women jam the airwaves, monopolize magazines, and slink across movie screens—all while being celebrated by the world. Popular culture today often makes women look silly, inconsequential, mindless, and powerless. It objectifies them and disrespects them. And so, my dear young women, with all my heart I urge you not to look to contemporary culture for your role models and mentors. Please look to your faithful mothers for a pattern to follow. Model yourselves after them.”

            I was quite pleased with this council. I couldn’t help but think of the countless women who have acted as mentors, and role models in my life. These women have gone beyond radiating confidence. Women who I hope to aspire to be like someday. First my thoughts turn to the women in my home. My dear Grandmother Hales. I think about her sacrifice to be a woman in the work force. I think of the large sphere of influence she had on the world. Though she was an intellectual and spiritual giant, she still found time to kneel and play with her very young grand daughter on the floor. I am grateful for her example, for her gentleness.

            I think about my Mother. I think about the sacrifices she has made for her children. I can’t help but think about my lovely aunts who have always treated me as their own.  On countless occasions they have welcomed me in to their homes with open arms. I think about my sisters. The women who I hold close to my heart, the women whom I call my dearest friends. My dear, dear sisters who I have always wanted to emulate. Between their varying personalities I am constantly finding things to learn from them.

My thoughts not only turn to the witty, confident, beautiful women of my family but they turn to the women who have invited me into their homes to watch their children. These women have spent countless hours in my driveway listening. Just simply listening to the troubled heart of a young woman.  I have learned about the kind of wife, and mother I want to be someday through their example. I consider myself very fortunate to have been surrounded by strong radiant women.

Each of the women mentioned have taught me how to radiate confidence. (Thankfully without cosmetic surgery.) My role models, and mentors radiate confidence because they love who they are. They radiate a different kind of confidence that is not contingent on scales, and numbers. They radiate light, because they know who they are. They have taught me what it means to be confident. The important lesson of learning how respect myself, despite what contemporary culture may preach.  

It is now my duty to be an example of what it truly means to radiate confidence. I can be an example to those around me. I want to be a mother that shows my children what a precious gift our bodies truly are. I want them to know that I enjoy being me quite a lot. I want to be an example of health. I want them to know that my happiness is not contingent on the size of my pants, or a number on a scale. I am grateful for the women in my life who have been wonderful examples of this. I am sorry for my very long, and drawn out tangent. Think of it as food for thought.  I hope all is well at home!

Cheers!

Miss Fin